The wants, the needs

I know, for some of you will think am an extremist. A rabbit, jumping here and there. I need excitement, I need goal. I thrive in last minutes, stressful time, the unknown situation. That’s me. When talk about stability, there’s sudden twist in my tummy. A butterfly trying to free itself from cocoon. That’s how I feel it. Stability is good! It will make you plan ahead and to achieve your goal/ target.

I am the type that will not stay still when it comes to new place. I will explore, till I get blisters n my foot. Yes. I feel that my life here, heading to the balanced, stable life.that’s good!! Really good. But I feel that I need to stir a bit. Change of place, or something like that. Okay, that phd application has been bothering me the whole day. Am not going to deny it. There!

But is it a wise effort? Is it the wise decision? Am I not grateful for what I have now? Why do I need to stir things up and start all over again? Ah. So many question.

This holiday can do to my head. Messing around, contemplating. Reanalyze, rethink on what I want to achieve in life. Of course, my yearly resolution is there as a target goal. But that is short term.

What is my long-term goal? to be my own boss? To open up consultancy? To win a pritzker architecture prize? To teach people? To design my heart desire? What?

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