I stop, struggling. I stop, hoping, and I totally stop trying. This happened after the incident, and I realised, that.. who will be there for me, and who doesn’t.
So, I stop at this. Will never trying hard to get noticed. I will never trying just to get that brief attention. I won’t compromise myself, my happiness and safety for the sake of just trying to get notice, and to be there.
Not that the feeling is gone, but priorities change.
I rather be alone that trying to beg for attention.
Let me quote something from Love, Rosie book/movie that going to be my mantra from now on:
You deserve someone who love you with every single beat of his heart, someone who thinks about you constantly, someone who spends every minute of every day just wondering what you’re doing, where you are, who you with and if you’re OK. You need someone who can help you reach your dreams, and protect you from your fears. You need someone who will treat you with respect, love every part of you, especially your flaws. You should be with someone who could make you happy, really happy, dancing on air happy.