Peer pressure

do I need a man to define my happiness? Why am I feeling the incompleteness? why am I behaving and feeling this way? is it peer pressure? I hate to see people’s wedding pictures in facebook. yeah I wish for their happiness in marriage life but it ain’t going to be the same for me. I have a long way to go. I have yet travel around the world, my awaiting bungee jumping, skiing at Swiss alps, getting lost at ecuador rainforest, skinny dipping at Fiji island, mountaineering at himalaya, drooling over Istanbul architectural, sand skiing, fall in love with Venezuelan or Spanish guy, shopping at the big apple.

I should be anticipating what’s next in life, not feeling depressed over peer pressure. Meeting someone is okay but to be in a serious big R, I’m not that serious over life, as yet.

but why do I worry?


I hate this feeling.

ok I lied. not just this feeling, there are other intersecting feeling that I’m trying to get rid of. I’m not going to admit, anything but due to my ‘gedikness’/ flirty-slutty attitude, I’m trapped in this dimension. shit. All I’m trying to do is to be the clown of the group, but as usual, I’m letting my guard down. I don’t shield myself, I’m vulnerable towards unplanned situation. served me right.

so please, please feeling go away. I’m just trying to cheer everyone up. please don’t fall for any unforeseen heartache again Ida.

please help me.

Is this what you will be feeling when you are reaching 25?

In that case, shoooooooot.

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